U, Me, and We

AN EVOLUTIONARY JOURNEY FROM TRADITIONAL TO RADICAL AND EVERYWHERE IN BETWEEN, FOCUSING ON U, ME, AND WE. AS INDIVIDUALS AND AS COUPLES, OUR EXPERIENCES, PERSPECTIVES, AND DESIRES SHAPE WHO WE ARE AND WHAT WE SEEK. ONCE OUR PATHS CROSS AND WE BEGIN TO MINGLE, THE CHALLENGES, ADVENTURES, AND THE REAL FUN BEGINS. WITHOUT ADAM AND EVE, NONE OF US WOULD COME TO BE. SO HERE’S TO A THOUGHT-PROVOKING, OPEN AND HONEST, INSPIRATIONAL AND REVEALING CONVERSATION ABOUT U, ME AND WE.

Happy Valentine’s Day

 

Valentines-Day-Wallpapers-201315

Happy Valentine’s Day to all.  A day dedicated to spreading love, but what if one day turned into a daily ritual of expressing the love we have for each other?  How would you verbalize everything your significant other means to you?  How would you describe the love you share?

Hallmark, true to their mantra of putting feelings and sentiments into words, began a new initiative called #PutYourHeartToPaper and gave loved ones the opportunity to use their own words when depicting their relationships, the importance of their counterparts, and what their love for each other truly means.  It is a beautifully raw example of how much love conquers and covers all.

Take a moment to view this couples’ heartfelt expressions of love for one another and when you are done, take the initiative to tell someone how much you love them and what their love means to you.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

 

Love Thyself

BrotherWord - Love Thyself

For any of us to be happy in any relationship, we first must be happy with ourselves.  Same rings true in love.  In order to receive or give love, we first must be able to love ourselves.  Loving ourselves is a phenomenal epiphany that happens over the course of lifetime and formulates as we begin to accept who we are, wonderfully and perfectly made in God’s image.

But what happens when loving ourselves becomes convoluted and blown out of proportion?  One Houston woman took loving thyself to another level and wait for it… married herself!  40 year old, Yasmin Eleby, made a promise to herself that if she had not found a suitable mate by the age of forty she would marry herself and earlier this month she did exactly that with the accompanying honeymoon.  See the article below which talks about and shows pictures from the elaborate wedding.

The conundrum is not the fact that she loves herself, but the lengths in which she went to express that.  How much is too much and what message is she really sending?  Furthermore, the multitude of people who participated and attended, was it healthy or productive that they are encouraging such behavior?  Eleby is correct in demonstrating that one must love themselves for who they are and in all their glory, but I have to disagree with the form of expression.

Not the first to pull off this feat, it is a mockery of the institution of marriage and all it stands for and also diminishes the theory that loving one’s self does not require making a grand announcement or spectacle.  To love oneself, all that is needed is self-awareness, self-appreciation, self-confidence, and self-acceptance.  In addition, to love thyself is a personal affirmation, not a public proclamation.  What is empowering and encouraging is knowing that even alone, I am still happy, I am just as great, I do not need someone to complete my life because I am whole, and I love myself no matter what.  How many times have you heard someone proclaiming, “I love myself.”  Not very often because it is not required or necessary.

If you want to express the love you have for yourself, simply do that.  Take pride in who you are, build the life you aspire to have, and take responsibility for your own happiness.  It does not require a lavish ceremony or a public display, but merely a look in the mirror as a reminder of how thankful you are for the life you have.

Do you think the solo wedding was too much or appropriate?  Would you marry yourself?  Let @BrotherWord know what you think and make sure to leave a comment here or at Twitter – @BrotherWord or Facebook.com/BrotherWord.

“Love yourself… Accept yourself… Forgive yourself, and be good to yourself.  Because without you the rest of us are without a source of many wonderful things.” ~ Leo F. Buscaglia

http://www.chron.com/life/weddings-and-celebrations/article/Houston-woman-marries-herself-in-elaborate-6040944.php

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2783665/Single-woman-failed-love-six-years-single-decided-marry-proposed-park.html

Silent Violence

BrotherWord - Silent Violence

BrotherWord - Mature Content

 

 

By now, everyone has seen the video of Ray Rice striking his then fiance’ Janay Palmer, knocking her unconscious.  The act was deplorable and there is no excuse or explanation and no matter what your opinion may be, I think everyone can agree it was a horrific sight to witness.  The question that I have been asked, by both men and women alike, is how could she possibly stay with him, let alone marry him? (more…)

#Ask BrotherWord

not BrotherWord - Dating 101

BrotherWord,

There seems to be a serious lack of qualified men in the marketplace and the art of courting has seem to become a thing of the past.  Has dating devolved to a couple of drinks in hopes of a one-night stand or is there a sliver of hope for courtship that resembles the days of my elders?  Do men really court women anymore or has courting a lady become passé?

Sincerely,

Dating 101 (more…)

Satisfaction

BrotherWord - Satisfaction

BrotherWord - Mature Content

 

 

 

 

When did self-satisfaction become paramount over self-dignity, self-respect, and the sanctity of marriage and relationships?  USA Network’s new show Satisfaction depicts the story a married couple who have become complacent and distant in their marriage.  He is an over-worked investor who is questioning his purpose in life while barely spending anytime with his wife or daughter.  She is an underappreciated and unfulfilled stay-at-home mom who suddenly realizes the life she once desired has somehow escaped her and now she is seeking “satisfaction” in all the wrong ways {check out the trailer}.  (more…)

Searching For Him

BrotherWord - Searching For Him

One of BrotherWord’s loyal followers – @gmilliboo – submitted an article in regards to Head of Household.  Tobi Atte’s Christian perspective on dating and women’s pursuit of finding a mate is refreshing and thought-provoking.  As he points out, searching for him greatly depends on the mindset you start out with.  Take a moment to read this insightful article and let @BrotherWord and @ijustmetme know your thoughts. (more…)

She Speaks

BrotherWord - She Speaks

Here is a PSA for my gentleman.  Over the past few weeks, several ladies have reached out to BrotherWord asking why can’t their men love them like they desire.  My initial question for each of them was “what exactly are you expecting that is not being fulfilled,” and as if it was a sorority pledge or an anthem, each lady was seeking the same.  So here are 5 tips for my guys to help you in your relationship and to also make sure when she speaks, she is being heard. (more…)

#Ask BrotherWord – Submission

#AskBrotherWord - Submit

BrotherWord,

Do you think women should be submissive to their husbands?  After having a conversation with a group of older ladies, I really began to wonder.  I was asked if I was submissive to men and told rather matter-of-factly, that I would continue to be single and forever lonely until I learned how to cater to my man!  They went on to say that young women are more about friends, careers, etc. first and treat men as a last priority.  Their definition of being submissive was that their needs are met after his and to allow the man to make choices and simply follow.  Call me crazy, but I’ve been making decisions for myself for quite sometime and I don’t need anyone making them for me now.  I have no problem collaborating, but it sounds to me they are saying I need to relinquish all freedom and personal choices.  That isn’t an option so now what?

SIncerely,

New Millenium Woman (more…)

1 True Love

BrotherWord - 1 True Love
 

Reflecting on this week of the #LoveRequiem movement, I’m resurrecting a poem I wrote many years ago.  Hope you enjoy!

1 True Love
 

When I first met you I was so infatuated, captivated, stimulated,

Being in your presence again is what I anticipated.

The more we talked, the more I learned,

The longer we were apart, the more I yearned.

The more we were together,

The more I thought, this could be forever.

Your style, your grace, your intellect had me intrigued,

Your versatility, your charisma, your aura filled a need.

It was more than a desire, more than lust

You filled the void I was missing, you became the one I trust. (more…)

Is Love a Choice?

BrotherWord - U, Me, and We - Love Is a Choice

Going into Valentine’s Day, there will be a lot of advertisement and talk about relationships and love.  Most of if it will be profit-driven, but some will actually delve into the meaning of love, the shifting paradigms of relationships, and how do we sustain fulfilling and lasting bonds.  After having a few conversations this past week, it reminded me of a post I wrote years ago, so I decided to resurrect it and see what the masses think.  Let BrotherWord know what your definition of love is and how it pertains to your relationships (intimate, familial, and work-related).  Leave your comments here or on Twitter with the hashtag #LoveRequiem.  Welcome to Love Requiem Week where we are putting to rest the notion that love and relationships are dead! (more…)

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